All Souls' Day

 No, I'm not Catholic, but a number of the Disciples congregations I've belonged to have done either All Saints', All Souls' or some combination of both. (I am not sure if we will do anything next week - the current minister is a little, you might say low-church. Nothing against him, it's just his style is different than some other people's. I admit I tend to be more high-church myself, which is perhaps odd for someone in what is sometimes called a "Reform" denomination (as in: Reformation of the Reformation, doing away with some of the more fancy trappings in the older Reformation churches). 

I don't think I can properly say I *like* or *enjoy* the day. It's a holy day, not a holiday, and it is in some ways a bit somber - you are remembering the people that have been lost in the past year. Oh, I mean, yes, hope-of-the-Resurrection and all that - but I think it's also valid to feel sad because you cannot have these people in your life any more in the here and now. 

I think it's important to stop and remember. To stop and mourn, if you need to.

I remember years and years ago - it would have been 1989 - when my grandmother died, I didn't really mourn her properly until All Saints'. She died in August, we were getting ready to move to Illinois, I was finishing some summer classes I was taking at Akron...and so everything was so busy and I think I was maybe a little shell-shocked because she was the first "big" death of my adulthood. Oh, I cried at the visitation (but smiled at the funeral - which was more a celebration of life than anything, and of course Grandma was 92, and had had a very long and full life and was loved by many). 

And then back in 2019 - still fresh in the grief from my dad, I forgot what day was coming and scheduled myself to pray at the table.

And midway through, referencing All Saint's (the minister we had at that time was more high-church), it all hit me again and I cried, right there at the communion table. Oh, people understood totally and no one faulted me. But I felt bad about the loss of control in public. (If I remember, also this was not long after Liz - a friend and former member - had died pretty suddenly, and I think people were feeling that too).

But I think it is important to stop and mark and remember.

This is the hymn I always associate with this day, and I do think it's one done best with pipe organ and large chorus to do it up right.

Anyway, this year I'm thinking about the people I lost from my life in this past year - Mecy and Dell and Jo. But also the people I lost last year (Bob S. and Paul, and Joe from church and a few others). And of course, as I commented elsewhere - this day hits differently when you know that many, many families are missing someone; that here in the US there will be one less place set at the Thanksgiving table in a few weeks (that was one of the Hard Things going to my mom's for Thanksgiving in 2019....)

Anyway, I play that hymn and I think of them. And may the next cycle - from now through 2022 - have fewer families losing loved ones than 2020 and 2021 did.