amen, sister.

I think maybe I'm going to have to be better about scheduling time "home alone, on the couch" instead of buying into the idea that it's having nothing "better to do." I think I'm hitting (or maybe already have hit) a wall, and that's a reason for a lot of my malaise. I'm glad other people feel the same way. It's hard being surrounded by people who look (on the surface at least) like they have superpowers and sitting in a meeting or something and thinking, "My gosh, I wish I was at home watching 'Little Bear' right now."

There's also a more theologically-minded concept called "Wretched Urgency," which basically is a trap some folks fall into, where if they're not (in a religious setting) out trying to save souls, then they're wasting their time, and actually, perhaps, sinning. I think there are also concepts of "Wretched Urgency" in other areas of life. I think perhaps our society pushes people to achieve and denigrates time spent doing "nothing." I do not know why that is - perhaps part of the bigger-is-better mentality. But I do know that I'm suffering from a surfeit of trying to do too much, and a lack of just being able to do "nothing."

I need to stop comparing myself to other people. What was the old line that Peter Sellers used? That he didn't know who he was any more because he was so much in the business of pretending to be other people, that he had his own personality surgically removed?