the next color

 I worked some more on Orchard and Vine this weekend

I joined in the next color. It's supposed to be a watery blue but in this light it looks more greenish. I'm not very far with the slip stitch pattern - it's the same as the green-to-yellow transition, but because here the yellow is the background color instead of green, it looks different. 

It's all garter stitch so it does grow somewhat slowly.

***

One of the members of the Completely Pointless and Arbitrary group on Ravelry passed away. She was somewhat isolated (I guess a sister was the next of kin?) and ha had slightly shaky health I guess, and she just stopped posting so someone who lived nearer to her than most of us had someone check up, and she was gone. I don't know the details but apparently an ME was involved in determining what happened. 

It's sad. Life is really fragile and short and that's something I've had regularly shoved in my face the past few years. And I HAVE to figure out some way to meet a few new people here; I keep losing the ones I have and I'm afraid of being so alone and isolated that, yes, I will die, and no one will realize it for weeks. And while I know it won't matter to me at that point, it matters to me at THIS point and kind of haunts me. 

Also I've really realized how fragile *I* am. Saturday I spent part of the day using my weed-whacker to knock down (most of) the tall weeds/rank grass in the yard - it didn't really need mowing yet, the stuff there would largely not be susceptible to the reel mower I have, and I doubted I could push the reel mower fast enough for it to be effective. 

I was okay Sunday - a little tired and a little sore - and I stood for a while making the bean enchiladas for dinner. 

But then this morning I HURT. I really hurt badly and had lost some flexibility and was really worried I had re-injured myself (And yeah, I fear I AM going to have to plan on meniscus surgery this summer, this thing just isn't getting better, it's been almost 2 1/2 months). I did do ten minutes on the cross-country ski exerciser and did the PT stretches after school today and I feel *some* better, but....it's very tiresome. And I realize with some fear that if there were a major incident in my building where we'd have to run to get away - well, I just have to quick make my peace with my life ending then and there because I can't run right now, and can't walk as fast as I'd want, and I'm far too heavy for someone to carry, especially if they needed to be escaping too.

(And yes, we still have a police presence; they will probably be here until the end of the semester. We're all a little on edge)

I dunno. Perhaps in an extreme situation I could just make myself run, and say "to heck with how much further it damages me, I can get it operated on later" but I'm not sure I could move fast enough and that scares me.

I hated teaching from home in 2020 but I can see how in dangerous times, maybe teaching from home would be better........like if you felt there was someone likely to be violent coming to campus. (And no, I doubt our troubled student is, and I doubt they would come after me, they never had me in class, but it's still unsettling to see police walking around and to know a colleague who is sort of a friend may be in their sights.)

I don't know. I feel like I could use a little comfort but not sure where to go for it.