Got the MRI report conveyed to me by my regular doctor's office: large "bone bruise" (I don't know either: I didn't fall, it wasn't a contact injury" and a torn meniscus. I don't know how badly. I assume the guy will recommend surgery which just UNDOES me - do I put it off until summer, lose my ENTIRE summer productivity to being immobile and on freaking crutches AND NOT EVEN ABLE TO DRIVE BECAUSE IT'S MY RIGHT LEG or do I do it now and wind up teaching online horribly the rest of the semester, and just giving people "gimme points" for the labs I won't be able to do
I'm hoping - probably fruitlessly - it will be a small enough tear he's willing to let me try to heal myself. I am not an athlete, I don't really NEED it back perfect, I just need to be healed enough to be out of pain and maybe to fieldwork.
I just feel like I've been punched in the gut.
And I don't even KNOW what a "bone bruise" is, whether that's what's causing the remaining pain or if it's the meniscus
ANYWAY I will never trust anything ever again; I was feeling much better this morning when i got up and was thinking "oh I might get to go out and do something fun this weekend for my birthday" but I bet I get told to stay as immobile as possible (except for WORK of course) and I guess I'm just not allowed happiness or fun now and I hate everything. I guess the lesson is, never be happy, because it'll just be taken away. NEVER look forward to anything. Just drift and exist and don't expect anything good.
2 comments:
Oh, ugh. I've never heard of a "bone bruise" before. I hope maybe it turns out to be a non-surgical treatment...but it does sound like something that involves long periods of immobilizing the limb.
Oh no. Fingers crossed they suggest some treatment less drastic than full-on surgery. — Grace in MA
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