hitting a wall

(Warning: I will be complaining in here, even though I know of the three members of my family in BNL at the moment, I by far have it the easiest)

I've just hit a wall with this thing. Not only am I alone almost all day, I don't have a car, so I can't go out and do stuff. I have to try to fix meals in an unfamiliar kitchen and if some ingredient is missing I'm out of luck.

I would be better off being in my own house at this point; at least I know where everything is and I can drive to Pruett's if I'm out of onions or cheese or whatever. (Yes, one of the stores here does grocery delivery, but that seems like a big thing to have to do and I'm sure there are minimum orders).

But of course, I can't GET home, not right now. And when I looked at various webcams along the Mississippi where I would be traveling....well, it's like poking that tooth that hurts. I'm not sure the train will even be running a week from now, when I'm scheduled to go home. Not sure what I'll do then but a few more days and my "allowed" time for mail to be held (30 days) will run out and I am not sure what to do about that.

If worse comes to worse I could fly back, but then....how to get from the airport in Dallas to Mineola? I don't have a smartphone so even a ruinously-expensive Uber trip would be out. The TRE or Dart don't run out there. I know exactly one person in the Dallas area and I'm not sure his schedule would even remotely work for picking me up at the airport, much less driving me to Mineola.

I don't think Megabus or whatever it's called runs to Mineola, and the thought of a Greyhound trip like that makes me want to weep.

I could get to St. Louis on the train, but no farther.

There's some talk that there "might" be a few seats on...Southwest Chief, I think? A more northerly route. And then you take a bus from Newton, Kansas, to OKC, and then the Heartland Flyer and then from there....well, I STILL couldn't get to Mineola, could only get to Fort Worth. So I don't even know. If I could get somewhere without AWFUL traffic maybe I could do a one-way car-rental and drive to Mineola to get my car....I'm just out of ideas. I guess I just let my mail-hold expire and mail get sent back or thrown out, and I just stay stuck up here until I can get home.

I couldn't have foreseen this; practically all the flood-generating weather was AFTER I got here, but it makes things hard.

I have paid all the bills I had outstanding (the city water bill was far harder to get paid than it should have been, and also ironically, it was the smallest of all of them). Honestly the biggest concern right now in re: not getting back is mail (and also, I miss my house, and I hope my plants aren't dying, and I hope that AJ was able to get the lawn mowed and I don't come back to a jungle and a fine from the city - in which case I will plead every hardship I can, being "trapped" by the flooding, my dad being in the hospital...)

But yeah.  A week visiting family is not quite enough but three weeks - especially three weeks where I'm alone for much of the middle week - is too much.

I promised my mom I'd pick up and vacuum before my dad is due to come home tomorrow, but I just can't bring myself to tonight. I put a few things away but I just...hit a wall. The heck of it is there's no one here I can complain to (hence I am doing so on the blog) because (a) there's no one here and (b) when my mom IS home, I don't want to complain at her. (One set of neighbors is out of town, the other set my parents know well are still both working - one rather long hours - so that's out). 

I dunno. I feel like I need a treat of some kind but of course that's not possible. I'm just sad and have had too many worrisome things the past few days and I've kind of hit a wall.