Wednesday, September 06, 2017

Deploying Rarity again.

(TW: disturbing image of upset Rarity).

Yeah, so....I got home after trying to do a little of the name-checking (there is NO WAY I am going to have this done by the end of this week and it's causing me a lot of stress because I said I "should" have it done by then to the person, but I did not count on a lot of the things taking longer because the person who typed this up the first time CANNOT SPELL and a lot of the unfamiliar names are misspelled, which adds another step and more time for me). Also I can only do bits at a time because my eyes start to cross and my head starts to hurt.

But anyway. Came home to a message from the church secretary. Turns out the step-son is BANNING us from doing a reception. So the stuff I bought for the jam bars goes unused. I'm glad she called before I actually baked them but seriously? I shouldn't be upset about this but I am. I mean, yes, I get that hour or so of time back, but I'm upset because I saw it as a way of honoring her memory a little bit. And this just reminds me of how very little I understand people - I can't imagine what the guy's motivation is.

But yeah. I am right now eating Nutella straight from the jar (so much for trying to reduce, at least today) and am trying to decide whether to do my daily bit of Duolingo first, or practice piano, or wash my hair.

All my life I've cared so hard what other people think and feel - both of me, and how they feel in general, and I literally can't understand being so set on your one way that you're going to prevent people from doing something important to them. He didn't have to attend the reception!

I dunno. I'm just done. Fried. Tired. Wanting to cry, but crying won't help because there's no one here to ask me what's wrong or to tell me it's going to be okay, so I just woman up and keep going even though I'm SO TIRED.

I did close back off the spot where I think the mouse got in, and I wiped down areas I especially don't want them going (i.e. the entryways to the kitchen and to my bedroom) with mint oil in the hopes of at least repelling them if there are any more.

But yeah:


1 comment:

purlewe said...

I didn't read this until today. OH NO! this sounds awful. I am so sorry. *sending good vibes from here to you*