Better days ahead

Or at least, I hope so.

Thanks for all the comments; they do help. (Lydia, I think you're particularly right on stressful times making people act graceless).

I feel better this evening; part of it is having spent the day alone, doing what I wanted to do. (I really do think when I spend too much time around people, I get really sapped and just need to be away for a while). I sewed some on the quilt I posted the layout for yesterday; it goes together much easier than it laid out. (I think if I ever do another quilt like that, with challenging interlocking rows, I'm going to make a mock-up on graph paper using a different color of colored pencil for each of the fabrics involved, and do the layout THAT way (or at least, do it that way first) before crawling around on the floor. (I know: I could also get myself a big piece of flannel and make myself a "design wall," except I'm not sure where I'd put the design wall, most of my walls are occupied with bookcases or pictures)

I also shifted over midday and quilted some on the quilt in the frame (I turned the LAST corner of the last border; I have about 2' more of border to quilt and then it's done). I also knitted some on the sleeve of the Ropes and Picots cardigan.

And I started a scarf this weekend, to be given to the Red Scarf Project if they're still active, and somewhere else if they're not. And I'm still thinking about dragging out some of the stockpiled yarn and making some watchcaps with it to give somewhere. (I have a bunch of the self-patterning sportweight yarn  - some of it in "manly" colors - that I got really cheap from Elann years ago with the thought of doing that).

Just being able to work on stuff helps. And also getting a little distance from all of the situations helps. I tend to be a "reactor," as much as I try not to show my feelings in public - I react strongly and badly to things, but then I get over the things pretty fast. So I react fast and violently, but I'm resilient.

***

I was thinking about the My Little Pony show again. I didn't remark on it but one of the Saturday episodes was the re-run of "Lesson Zero," also known as the Twilight Freaks Out episode. (Short summary: She is supposed to send weekly reports to her mentor. This particular week she has nothing to report on. So she freaks out, assumes the worst: she's a bad student, she'll get in trouble, she'll get sent back to Magic Kindergarten. And then she tries to CREATE a situation she can write on, which causes its own problems.) It's never been exactly a *comfortable* episode for me, because I'm hyper-diligent and do tend to tie myself in knots if I am prevented from doing something I believe I "should" do.

And I tend to "awfulize" things. (I've even adopted the "I'll get sent back to Magic Kindergarten!" line - as a way of trying to jolly myself out of that way of thinking. It doesn't always work.)

But on this reviewing, the thing that really bugged me was the fact that all of Twilight's friends dismissed her worries - didn't take them seriously, kind of ridiculed them. And I've been there. And it's an awful place to be, when something looks big and potentially world-ending to you, and it seems like no one else sees it that way. (And of course, in the middle of that, you're never QUITE rational enough to go, "Wait, these reasonable people are telling me not to freak out over this, so perhaps I should not.") Also, Princess Celestia (the mentor figure) is not as kind as she might be, or so I think....at the end she jokes about not punishing Twilight provided her friends also start sending reports to her. And while she is joking about the idea of a punishment, still, were I in Twilight's horseshoes, it wouldn't help me....because I tend to get very literal minded (I mean, more than normally) when I'm upset, and I'd hear it as, "Oh...she's not going to punish me because she's telling my friends to do something. But I might still get punished! And what if my friends don't work up to her standards! Oh, no, I'm going to have to hound my friends to write their reports...")

I guess what I wanted Celestia to say to Twilight was something like "Oh, dear heart. You are so diligent and you work so hard. I understand that you did not have anything ready this week. That happens sometimes. Do not worry about it; from here on out I will only want reports when you have something to report. If I had known how much this would upset you, I would have told you from the start to only send reports when you are ready." Or perhaps I'm just Mary Sue-ing myself into the shape of a small lavender pony. 

I think one of the reasons for which this show has gained such an adult following IS the fact that you can, even as an adult, relate to some of what the characters go through, some of the basic personality stuff. (And granted, the freakouts are overplayed about 250%, but that's par for the course in a cartoon).

I also got to thinking about the other characters and their "freakouts."

Rarity, of course, tends to be a drama queen, but her biggest moment came when the Pony version of Karl Lagerfeld ridiculed her designs (the ones her friends insisted she redesign following their inept guidance). Where she contemplates having to go into exile (and wonders if one packs warm or cold for exile), and also bemoans that she knows she's supposed to wallow in SOMETHING, but isn't even sure of what ponies are supposed to wallow in....

Fluttershy has "the stare," but she also had the "YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE ME!!!!" moment in the gardens at Canterlot, when the birds and animals were running away from her. (I have to admit, I've had moments of "YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE ME!!!!" happen in my own mind, but rather than grabbing a butterfly net and going after whomever I want to "friend," instead I start tying myself into knots to DO stuff....to take on thankless tasks, or volunteer for things, or squash down my own opinions and not speak out, or whatever, in the misguided belief that that will make people like me. People-pleaser, I am it.)

Pinkie Pie loses it when she thinks her friends are avoiding her and squeezing her out (when they are actually trying to plan a surprise birthday party for her.) I can't relate to this one QUITE so well, because usually I don't go hostile when I feel squeezed out, I turn into an Eeyore and just mope off home and hide.

Rainbow Dash is tougher as she's usually pretty confident...except during the Best Young Flyer competition, when she winds up cowering in a corner and switching numbers with other pegasi (Even, IIRC, Derpy)  as her number comes up.

And Applejack...well, she never has a public moment of freaking out that I can recall. Then again, in many ways, she's probably the most level-headed of the ponies (Probably had to grow up fast, what with a younger sister and no parents in the picture). But she is the suffer-in-silence type: working herself nearly to death when she's too proud to ask for help, and also running away and taking a job to earn money, when she didn't win the money she expected to in the rodeo. A lot of her less rational actions seem to be motivated by saving face and avoiding bringing dishonor to her name or her family. (And the whole suffer-in-silence-until-totally-overwhelmed thing: Yeah, that's a 'feel' I know too. Probably a little too well).

So, I suspect a big part of the adult fan base comes because there's something at heart in these characters that "feels real" and is something many of us can relate to - even, as I said, taking into account the broad overplaying that happens in a cartoon realm. I've watched some of the other newer cartoons (including the Care Bears one, which I think they explicitly tried to attract adult fans to, thinking they could recreate the magic of My Little Pony...and while it's a respectable cartoon, as such things go, it's just not the same. It's very clearly a kid's cartoon and not a whole lot more.)