I don't know if it was the horrid week, or if viruses and their attendant immune-response can mess with a person's mood, but when I was doing some cleaning and changing the sheets in my room, I decided to put on some Christmas music.

(Yeah, I know, it's way early. But when you're as busy as I am...you don't really always have time to ENJOY).

And suddenly, I found myself thinking of all the people (not all of whom I enumerated on the blog) that I won't be wishing a Merry Christmas to - or going to parties with (because they moved away) or that I won't be able to even send a card or a gift to (because they died). And I just had to sit down and cry. I don't know if I'll have the energy to put my little tree up this year. Usually this weekend is when I do it, to get the maximal enjoyment time out of it before I leave for Christmas. But I also have to get the leaves raked up and plant the daffodil bulbs I bought. And I have to get back to the rule of working a minimum of an hour on research a day.

So I don't know. I'm hoping this is just a transient after effect of the virus and not something more serious. I've never had that happen before - think about Christmas and then just sit down and cry because of all the people who won't be "around the table," literally or metaphorically, this year.