Pirate jokes!
For some reason, I know a bunch of pirate jokes. And I love pirate jokes. And I heard a new one this morning.
So, for a Monday morning, here are my pirate jokes for you:
Q. Did you hear about the new pirate movie?
A. It's rated "Arrrrr!"
(hahahahaha. That one ALWAYS makes me laugh no matter how many times I've heard it. It's so silly but it's like my favorite joke ever. There's also a variant: why couldn't the 15 year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated "Arrrr!" But I like my version better).
Q. What kind of socks do pirates wear?
A. Arrrr-gyles
(Pirates AND knitting! I slay me!)
A pirate captain walks into a bar. One very obvious feature of his dress is a small ship's wheel extending from the waistband of his pants, in the front, about where the fly would be. The bartender notices it but decides not to say anything at first. The pirate orders a drink and he and the bartender get to talking. Finally, the bartender can't stand it any more:
"Captain...I see you seem to have a ship's wheel coming out of your pants..."
The pirate replied: "Arr, it's driving me' nuts!"
(Yeah, that one's a little off-color and perhaps NSFW if you work at a day care or a nunnery)
And the new one:
Q. What does a dyslexic pirate say?
A. RRRRRRaaaaaa!
(my apologies to the dyslexics of the world. I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at the pirates.)
1 comment:
those were great! when i worked at OTC, whenever a customer would call in ordering pirate stuff, i would always tell my easy joke. what's a pirate's favorite letter? ARRRRRRRRRR! or, as one person said AAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEE!
then of course, you heard about the pirate who went to get his ears pierced. do you know how much they charged him? a bucaneer (buck an ear).
I SLAY ME!
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