and another loss

 My mom just called me. One of my aunts, the wife of my dad's middle brother, just passed away.

 

She had had dementia (probably Alzheimer's) and I didn't know it, but she recently had a stroke, too, and she died last night. 

I think of what my friend Wanda said, about how when someone you knew when you were younger dies, that you are not just mourning the person, but in a way, mourning the experiences you had when they were around, and it brings home that those times can never happen again.

I admit we had at times a difficult relationship; she could be kind of picky and I admit at times she rubbed me the wrong way. But me being me, I kept my mouth shut and usually just went avoidant. 

But still. I remember her at my brother's wedding, and I remember her laugh, and I remember the family reunions. 

And knowing my family is a bit smaller now is hard.  

I'm in here trying to work on my research but also running into a few logistical (mainly: lack of space for things) issues and now it's a little harder to do it.