Leaning into comfort

 Just another long week with confusing and frustrating news. I also had a vivid memory today of how my junior high and high school used to do carnation sales for charity for valentine's day and literally every year I was in those two schools no one ever sent me one (the tradition was boys sent them to girls; no boys liked me) and that made me sad again, both that it happened and also that it bugs me still all these years later. Valentine's day really is a pretty unfair holiday in its modern incarnation. 

And Monday is a federal holiday, but I don't get the day off, but there will be no mail/trash pick up/banks open so that loads a tiny bit more of cognitive labor on me to remember to take care of any of those things on another day.

So I am looking for sources of comfort, no matter how silly:

 * Re-runs of Bluey. I've seen all the episodes multiple times (I'm not sure they're even going to make new ones; I know they said the voice actresses for the kids have grown up to the point they don't do "childlike" voices any more). But it's a good show.. The characters in it are kind, and there often reminders of the simple values (don't lie, share, comfort those who are sad) that I learned as a child and that now....when I look at the world I wonder if those have just been suspended now. It's also frequently quite funny in a gentle way. (And it can make me cry; there are several episodes that do that)

* On my Pandora stream in my office - mostly baroque but it's lately added in some choral music, mostly hymns - it occasionally plays a Christmas piece out of season. (The algorithm doesn't know). In the past I'd hit "skip" but now, you know? When something like Dormi Jesu comes on, I let it play. It makes me feel good. It reminds me of the happy Christmases of the past, and of that time leading up to the holiday when there's more that seems special and nice and good in the world. 

* Good books. I finally finished "Double Negative" and while it ended better than it might have, it's not a book I have any desire to keep or re-read so I'll either donate it somewhere (sadly, we don't have Little Free Libraries (^1) so I'll have to either donate it to the library for their book sale or see if - if I ever get down there-  the used book shop in Sherman would give me a buck or two in trade for it.

 (1. We have Blessing Boxes instead. Because we're a lower SES area. Blessing Boxes are places where people with a little more money leave non perishable food for the folks in absolute dire straits - people who have even fallen through the cracks of food bank coverage.. I know where three are in my town; I've helped fill the one at the campus Wesley Center)

Anyway: I started Terry Pratchett's "Equal Rites" (the first of the Witches series) last night. And I had forgotten how much I needed good STORIES. Stories that were fleshed out and had amusing characters and interesting settings. I'm only about 20 pages in but it's good so far.

*  The new air freshener in my car. I normally don't use these but a friend sent me a Cococoro Coronya (a San-X franchise - cute cats that run a bakery) one with a rose scent and it's....really nice? I put it in my car and it does make the car smell nice. 

* My various stuffed animals. Yes, I have a lot. Yes, they are scattered everywhere (my bed, my sofa, Princess the Alicorn lives next to my recliner so I can hold her on my lap when I knit). But they do help; most nights I sleep with one of them squished up to my chest. 

* I've ordered more yarn. I don't know, I think my "but I might not be able to get it in the future!" is being triggered by all the talk of tariffs and retribution by various countries. And also I heard that the JoAnn's nearest me is one of the ones shutting down and I don't even know where one that remains open will be (Maybe McKinney, but I don't like driving there any more, the traffic is incredibly awful and the drivers are so aggressive). I mean, there IS still a Michael's but they are a SMALL Michael's and don't have a huge yarn selection. So I feel like I'm becoming a crafts survivalist. (I really need to go through and sort my stash and remember what all I have. Should do the same with some of the books I have boxed up)