Welp.

 I did not use my weekend profitably. I guess I did a little housekeeping on Saturday and I had Zoom knitting and did some knitting, but I also mostly hung out online and today was a not good day because of Reasons. I have decided I have to let myself remain a bit ignorant about the sausage that's rapidly being made because a few of the eo's I saw were somewhat upsetting (hopefully there is pushback, or things that can't actually be done) and so I'm gonna have to avoid the news for my own mental health because I have no power to change or fix anything (which is deeply upsetting to me; I can't make anything better for anyone, so why do I even exist?)

I'm trying to remember what I said roughly eight years ago, "as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord," meaning I keep doing what good I think I can do even if it seems futile. 

I did pull out the Moon Moth pullover and added a few rounds to it, but it's such slow going - I still have fifteen rounds before I even start the colorwork. And it was hard to find anything to watch on tv, so much of it was stuff I did not want to see or think about. I find it's increasingly hard for me to stay in a chair and work on "optional" things - I can get the stuff on a deadline done, but when it's something just for me, it's hard. I do think the past few years have done something to my brain and I don't like it. (And right now, I'm not going to even consider the ADHD assessment or anything, I don't think anything good can come of that, at least in the near future)

I have to remember tomorrow afternoon to grab the stuff I need for Wednesday's lab, so I have it. That's another thing: teaching in different buildings require a level of organization and remembering that's more than I normally have to do, and it's tiring - there's no running down the hall (or, in lab  - popping in to the prep room attached to the lab) to get a forgotten thing, you either have to have it, be able to do without it, or waste 10-15 minutes of class going back to get it.