Disturbance in force...

I learned today that Caroll Spinney, the man behind both Oscar the Grouch and Big Bird, has passed away.

Even though I know he was suffering near the end (he had dystonia) and it may be in some way a bit of a relief for his family he's out of pain, it's still sad.

As I said on Twitter: it feels to me like a bit more of the light has gone out of this Earth. Everything I've ever read suggested that in addition to being very accomplished at his craft (Big Bird *rollerskated* once. Think about that - guy in a 7' bird suit, using a monitor to "see" where he's going, is on rollerskates and makes it look plausible that this big old bird is *skating*), he was a nice guy.

there's the famous Reddit AMA, that has one of the stories that is simultaneously the most heartbreaking and heartwarming thing:

"This is a very sad story, but it's real.

I got a letter from a fan who said his little boy, who was 5 years old, his name was Joey, he was dying of cancer.

And he was so ill, the little boy knew he was dying.

So the man, in his letter, asked if I would call the little boy. He said the only thing that cheered him at all in his fading state was to see Big Bird on television.

So once in a while, he wouldn't see Big Bird on some days, because he wasn't necessarily in every show. So he asked could I telephone him, and talk to the boy, tell him what a good boy he's been.

So I took a while to look up a phone, because this was before cell phones. And they got a long cord to bring a phone to the boy.

And I had Big Bird say "Hello! Hello Joey! It's me, Big Bird!"

So he said "Is it really you, Big Bird?"

"Yes, it is."

I chatted a while with him, about ten minutes, and he said "I'm glad you're my friend Big Bird."

And I said "I'd better let you go now."

He said "Thank you for calling me Big Bird. You're my friend. You make me happy."

And it turns out that his father and mother were sitting with him when the phone call came. And he was very, very ill that day. And they called the parents in, because they weren't sure how long he'd last.

And so his father wrote to me right away, and said "Thank you, thank you" - he hadn't seen him smile since October, and this was in March - and when the phone was hung up, he said "Big Bird called me! He's my friend."

And he closed his eyes. And he passed away.

And I could see that what I say to children can be very important.

And he said "We haven't seen our little boy smile in MONTHS. He smiled, as he passed away. It was a gift to us. Thank you.""

That's also the AMA that contained the statement (in the comments) that I love and think is true. A young man on there comments about how the story made him cry, and how it "sucks" to be an 18 year old man who tears up easily, and another redditor said:

"trust me, it's better than being the opposite. a soft heart is a good heart"

And I remember that some times, when I berate myself for being too soft hearted or emotional about things.

There's also a moving video of him - in full Big Bird get-up - singing "It's not easy being green" at Jim Henson's funeral, and you can hear the tears at the end.

I admit, Big Bird was not my favorite Sesame Street muppet - that honor goes to Grover. But Big Bird was a good character, and I think one children related to. 

I also think of the episode that dealt with "Mr. Hooper's" death (the real actor who played him had died, and rather than simply lampshading the departure with a "oh, he moved away" or similar, they decided to confront death, which was a good thing, I think). And Big Bird, because he's meant to be the perpetual six-year-old, declares, "I don't like it! It makes me sad!" and wow, if that isn't Big Mood for all the stuff that's happened in my life the second half of this year. (But because I'm 50 years old instead of 6, I have to say something more like "I have to accept it, but I don't like it")

But yeah. I know on some level that a lot of the performers I know from childhood will start leaving us, it's still kind of a gut-punch when we lose certain ones.