Friday, June 01, 2018

Herd of turtles

A phrase I remember from my childhood, and which I use ironically as an adult:

"Off like a herd of turtles."

My dad used to say this. Every family vacation, every trip to visit relatives, he would be like "We are getting on the road at *6 AM* so we can miss a lot of the traffic"

And every year it caused consternation:
- upset because everything had to be packed and IN THE CAR the night before (We did not live in a neighborhood where that meant it was likely your stuff would be stolen. But still.)

- consternation over "Everything?" meaning "even the stuffed toy one of the children WILL NOT sleep without having to be in the car the night before?"

- frustration over "but how are we going to do packed lunches, then, without them being spoiled?" (And my brother and me hoping beyond hope that maybe THIS TIME we would actually plan to stop at a restaurant)

- and then finally, the morning of, realizing:
    - the plants didn't get watered the night before
    - there was something we need that is in the dryer
    - some important item is still on the kitchen table

or whatever.

And so, pulling out of the drive at 8 or 9 am, my father would groan, "We're off like a herd of turtles."

(I will say we were better than SOME of my relatives; I remember on a family trip to visit them there was so much debate over "go to a movie or go to the local museum" that by the time a majority decision had even been reached (with the losers pouting), the movie was already half over and the museum had closed for the day)

Anyway. I use the phrase now, though sometimes more in joking than in anything. (Though it is frustrating, when a field lab is pending, with a 40 minute round trip and only a 2-hour lab, to have that last person going "Wait, I need to get a drink of water" or "I need to finish my lunch" before we can load up the vans).

(But also yeah: there is a reason I live alone)

1 comment:

purlewe said...

Off Like a Herd of Turtles!! My family uses this phrase too.

And I seem to remember an elephant phrase we used, but it isn't coming to me right now. something like sounding like a bunch of elephants when we were supposed to be quiet..