(Later on when I saw the comic below (forgive the just-barely-euphemized strong word there), I thought of how that summed up how I had wanted to be this morning, but wasn't. I had a hard time falling asleep last night for various reasons.)
(Though, 7 am? Fluttershy, what a piker you are. I'm in my office already at 7 am these days).
Taught my classes. Attendance was definitely down because of the rain. Got the standard "Do we get extra credit for being here" but this time I just laughed at it. (When I actually responded honestly one semester, I was excoriated by one student in evaluations, but then again, I think he was looking for reasons. As a prof, you have to just assume that anything you say can and will be taken out of context.)
Started on the revisions (so far they are seriously minor but I'm only 1/5 of the way into the thing so I'm bracing for some kind of surprise later on). I figure I can pick at these bit by bit so I don't get too annoyed. The thing is due in by the 30th....
I also met with a prospective student and did the building-tour thing. (the student was slightly misrepresented to me, I was told they were enrolling for spring, I thought, it turns out they just might apply here....)
My office window is leaking. Apparently the weatherstripping (it's some kind of rubberlike substance) is shot. I've put in a request but who knows how backed up Physical Plant is these days. Especially today because it's like after Louis XV out there right now.
I have CWF tonight, so I think I'm going to leave very soon for home so I can get a few minutes at home today. Also, I have to prep the lesson. (My friend....sigh, she had originally planned on doing them but that's not going to happen)
I also have to note....this is the first time I've had someone I am fairly close to going through hospice. My friend was given a "deadline" of 10 days (no, really), but it may have been the doctor trying to bully her into taking treatment against her wishes*. (She is now, I think, on Day 13). I'm actually surprised at how much this is sort of lurking in the back of my mind....every time I open my e-mail, I brace for The News. Every time the phone rings I jump a little. And I admit, perhaps it's self-centered, but I find myself idly thinking of, "What if you get old and sick? You really would have no one to take care of you" (my friend has several grown children, an adult granddaughter, and great-grandchildren). Oh, I suppose people from church (if my congregation survives that long, or failing that, I find another) would help, but it's different when it's not family. (My brother and sister in law are not really THAT much younger than I am, so I don't think I can count on them to be available)
(*and if that's the case? Bad Doctor. Bad, bad, bad Doctor.)
(I said it before, and I kind of stand by it: I'd rather take a sudden massive life-ending heart attack while out doing fieldwork or hiking or something (not for many many years yet, though, please) than something chronic that slowly ends my life)
One of the reasons right now I find myself retreating into things like Harry Potter is that it's an escape. I think the first time I read through Chamber of Secrets was the weekend my Aunt Chickie was dying and I knew there was no way I'd be able to get up there, even for the funeral, and it was just a way to keep my mind from running in the sad little slot-car track that it would get into.
I also have a couple other fantasy type books (The Thirteenth Tale, The Ladies of Grace Adieu, The Invention of Hugo Cabret (which I have read before but could read again) on the shelf. I also have my many, many Various Color Fairy Books that I could dip into - yes, some of the stories are Grimm and grim, but in a lot of them, cleverness or kindness or some other virtue triumphs, and so the grimness is somehow less grim.
1 comment:
I remember when they told my dad he had six months to live.
He beat that by a mere six years.
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