Momentary brief bitterness

Disregard at will. It's not been a good day today, and I need to get my feelings out a bit.

I'm still kind of sick. This is apparently one of the lingering kinds of viruses. The worst part is that I'm still tired and kind of sensitive/depressed/not able to deal with the slings and arrows of everyday life right now. Some viruses can do that.

(I suppose I should be grateful it's not PANDAS).

It's just, it's kind of a shock after a fairly restful weekend. Today alone, I:

1. Learned I didn't need to have cancelled my Wednesday afternoon class after all. I was under the impression we were expected to - but apparently that became NOT expected, and NO ONE bothered to inform me. So I'm losing a week of lab. (I can't re-convene the class now...too short a notice and it would lead to "But oh I made plans" butthurt or people not showing up and then saying they were confused).

2. I asked for a bit of sympathy over something and got completely rebuffed. And people wonder why I have a hard time reaching out to others. THIS is why. Because the one time when I really need a kind word, I don't get one.

3. I had about five things converge on my head at the same moment. I wound up sighing heavily at a class over something which will surely come back to bite me come evaluation time.

4. I still have a committee meeting to go to, one that will probably be long and tiring.

5. Someone said something to me that hurt my feelings* and when I called them on it they acted all disbelieving that it was possible that what they said could have hurt my feelings. Example number 2 of why I don't reach out to people and am somewhat of a hermit; it seems that when my feelings are involved people don't give a flying feather.

(*This is actually kind of uncommon; I'm generally good at figuring "it's not malice, it's poor communication" but I blame this stupid virus for making my membrane too permeable right now)

So, I don't know. I can tell my resistance to getting overwhelmed is really low right now but this is also one of those weeks where I'm just gonna have to power through stuff.

Also, it's kind of depressing having to account for all your meals of the day first thing in the morning - after I got up and dressed (still not up to working out), I made my lunch. Then I cut up some potatoes (which I really hope weren't too far gone...they were starting to sprout and I cut the sprouts off but I'm still worried) and dumped some sauerkraut and a cut up kielbasa on them and stuck it in the slow cooker (figuring that if this committee meeting is as horrific as I fear, I'll be trucking in at 6 pm or thereabouts, hungry and in no mood to cook). And then I fixed and ate breakfast.

I really need a Fritz Brenner.