Worst. Greeting. Ever.

Okay, so Sunday is the day when I can clock another successful (in the sense of, I'm Not Dead Yet) orbit around the sun. And I've got a few cards (and a mysterious Amazon box, which I have not opened yet, assuming it must be a gift, as I have not ordered anything from them lately).

I got a "card" yesterday from my health insurance.

Um, yeah. Nothing says, "OH HAI, you are one year closer to decrepitude" than a card (a flyer, really) from your health insurer. In English AND Spanish.

I wasn't really very happy with what it said. But then again: I suppose this is what you get if you are a conscientious/concerned person in a world where too many people are not.

It was a list of "healthy habits." And a strong suggestion that I follow those. (The unwritten, but assumed-by-me, subtext: because then you will cost us less money*).

(*Despite the fact that I weigh more than what any guideline I've ever seen says I should, the only thing I cost them - besides routine checkups - is treatment of my allergies. And the only way I could have prevented that, I think, is to have picked parents who wouldn't have given me a genetically tetchy immune system. Or maybe to have got myself colonized by parasitic worms at an early age; there's some research that suggests people who had worm parasites as a child are less prone to allergies.)

I can't remember all of the suggestions, but there were the standard "Eat more vegetables." "Eat less food overall." "Exercise more." "If you are overweight, get your weight down to what guidelines say it should be**" "Be sure to have the necessary tests for whatever someone your age should have."

(**some of the guidelines say I "should" weigh 140 pounds. Not unless I develop some horrible wasting disease. I think a lot of those "guidelines" are written for women who don't have much in the way of muscle mass. I know, I know: I'm carrying more fat than is ideal, but I'm also fairly muscular, thanks to regular workouts and the field research I do. And if I DIDN'T have that muscle, I couldn't DO the field research I do.)

Okay, with the exception of "weight within the guidelines" and arguably "eat less food" (because what is LESS, anyway? I don't eat a huge amount but I'm not going to make myself walk around hungry), I do all of the things they list.

And yet, it still makes me feel guilty and bad, like I'm not doing enough.

I tell myself: this is because there are people who don't think anything of eating a big Mac and large fries and shake on a daily basis. Or people who never exercise. But I still feel kind of bad about having a finger wagged at me (or that's how I see it) yet again: "bad fattie. BAAAAAAAD."

And I realize, this is largely my perfectionism talking: I think what I'm doing is telling myself, "You had the strength of character and willpower to earn a Ph.D., to earn tenure, to juggle all the million things you must do. WHY DO YOU NOT HAVE THE STRENGTH TO MAKE YOURSELF A SIZE 8?"

The last suggestion on this flyer-of-woe?

"Limit stress."

Sorry, health insurer. Way too late for that now. And you know, it's kinda your fault.

What would have been nice? Would have been at least one suggestion that was not either a "thou shalt not" or an invitation to something unpleasant (like a reminder that if you're over 50, you really should get regular colonoscopies). Something like, "Hey, enjoy the fact that you're alive!" or "If you have good health, be grateful for that!" or maybe, even, "Treat yourself a little on your birthday." (Though even then, I'd probably be all "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO HEALTH INSURER!")

Anyway. If they wanted to save some money they could just not mail out the darn fliers, I think.

(I may be in a slightly sour mood this morning because I didn't work out today: I woke up at 4 am with an incipient migraine (there are storms on the way) and figured it was better not to risk making it worse with the physical stress of a workout. Also, I am trying to up the intensity of the workout and found I have pulled a few muscles over the past few days, so I probably need a rest day)

We'll see if I get a birthday postcard from one of my elected representatives. I did one year, but I think that guy is out of office now. (The postcard did note, in big letters, that neither it nor its postage was paid for with tax dollars.)

So anyway, despite the fact that I'm super busy, and gas prices are peaking (Though if Gaddafi is replaced by someone kinder to the people of Libya and who "plays well" with the rest of the world, it will be worth it, I think), I'm going to McKinney Saturday. If for nothing else to go to Quilt Asylum and spend some time there ignoring the fact that I am really too busy.

I think of Holly Golightly, and how she said that she liked Tiffany's because it seemed like "nothing bad could happen to you there." That's kind of how I feel about Quilt Asylum (and quilt shops in general), and also a lot of the stores in McKinney (ever-changing though they may be.)

A check of the website reveals that Loco Cowpoke is still there (good! I can stock up on some of the gourmet food items), and the old-timey candy shop, and Morningstar Treasures. And "Smitten," which is where the Antique Collection (formerly my favorite antique shop) moved to when their building was taken for another purpose. And "Heirlooms," another small but nice antiques shop...

And Happiness is Quilting is still there, so I will be able to visit two quilt shops in the day. So really, the places I consider "important" destinations still exist (that's always a concern; it seemed the last time I was there the economy was really affecting the downtown shops). I'm going to get some money out of my savings account (which I normally keep for emergencies, but because of my usual frugality, there's a lot more in there than what most emergencies would require) and just plan on having a spending spree. I don't do this often (maybe twice a year), but it is just kind of fun to go with money in your pocket and the knowledge that if you see something you really want, you can buy it without worrying about it.

There's also a British Pub and Restaurant called "Churchill's." I may want to eat lunch there, seeing as the former Prime Minister and I are something like sixth cousins. (I joke that "fortunately I resemble the other side of the family...")