It occurs to me, on further thought, that all this kerfuffle comes down to something that some people may overlook:

We each need to define success for ourselves. And "success" will mean something different to different people.

One of the worst graduation speeches I ever heard - I was already out in the workforce but it depressed me and made me want to move back home with my parents a little - was a woman who exhorted the "kids" to "succeed." By her own narrow definition. Which was climbing the corporate latter, rung by agonizing rung. She told them to arrive at work before their bosses and to not leave until they were sure their bosses had. She exhorted them not to take vacations, because apparently, if you didn't make yourself seem indispensible, you'd never hang on to that precious, precious job. She never said outright - but it seemed that the implication was - you were a fool if you had hobbies or did volunteer work or spent more than minimal time with your families.

I couldn't believe it. She didn't allow for any other definitions of success - she didn't suggest that one could be an artist or a teacher or a stay-at-home-parent and be successful.

And you know? Thank goodness different people do have different definitions of success. Because if we didn't, there'd be no one willing to do different jobs - everyone would want exactly the same thing. It's precisely because we differ that there are people who really, really want to teach. Or people whose life's dream is to become a cardiac surgeon. Or people who sign up for the Peace Corps and go dig wells in some developing nation.

I think young people would do well to take some time to think about what their own personal definition of success is - and think about it seriously (Hrm. Maybe that could be next week's Youth Group lesson). I know when I was an undergraduate, I started formulating mine. What I came up with was this:

1. I wanted a career where I wouldn't have to worry about sacrificing my deeply held moral and ethical beliefs.

2. I wanted to make enough money to support myself in a certain degree of comfort (but not make lavish amounts of money; as I've said before, I don't think I'd fit in with the American aristocratic class, and that's mostly rich folk)

3. I wanted to do something I enjoyed, where most days I got up and looked forward to going to work.

4. I wanted to feel like I was making the world a better place, or at the very least, helping people out a little.

I also realized partway through that I really, really wanted to go to grad school (which was good, because it turned out I needed that for goal 2 and probably goal 3 as a biologist).

Later on, I realized I needed a goal five:

5. Have enough free time to have a life away from work; be able to read books for fun, pursue my needlecraft hobbies, and generally have downtime to recuperate.

And you know? I feel better having written those because I realize that despite all the things I think I'm NOT getting done, I have achieved those basic five, more or less. (Don't know so much about #4 some days, but that's a hard one to evaluate).

So anyway. Perhaps some of the conflict is that there are folks who don't recognize that everyone defines "success" the same way, and you need to pick and choose what is right for you?

(It could also come down to the fact that Britain is fundamentally more classist than the U.S. and the people attacking Jane Brocket see her as an "upper middle class twit" and just feel sort of jealous or are wanting to take her down a peg. Something.)

But yeah. I don't understand why we as women (my experience being purely as a woman - no Tiresias I - I don't know if men do this kind of thing to each other. I've never witnessed it, but it could happen in more private, "just among us men" situations) feel the need to do this.

Whatever you do, as long as it's legal and moral and it makes you happy, God bless you and keep doing it.

*****

On to pictures.

I finished the left front of Kenobi last night.



This has now become my "mainly work on THIS" project, partly because I can almost see it being done, and partly because it's gotten cooler again and I can imagine a time when it would be good to wear.

I searched out the remaining yarn for the rest of the sweater (I have two half-balls left from the left front).



My six little alpacas! I had to search quite a bit for all of these; I had moved/tucked away/hidden yarn in different places during different phases of house cleaning. It took me a long time to find that sixth ball; at first I was afraid I was misremembering how much I had used already and I was going to come up short, and then I found one of the ball-bands so AT LEAST I had the color and lot-number if I had to re-order.

But I kept searching. (I'm always reminded of the Parable of the woman who had the lost coin - how she turned her house upside down looking for it, and then rejoiced when she found it, when I am looking for something [often a ball of wool I have misplaced]. I am kind of like that.)

So now these are waiting - I have two half-balls left over from the left front, which will begin the right front, and it will probably take the better part of two more balls to do that, then I have the sleeves (which shouldn't take more than a front each) and a little bit needing to be leftover for a collar.

Also while searching I gathered up all the yarn for Samus, which I want to re-start. I'm almost done with the bottom band (and thank goodness, the row-counter telling me where I was in the pattern was right there with it). I'm telling myself once I cross the Khyber Pass of picking up allllllllll those stitches, it will be nice easy stockinette for a long while.



It's hard to see the colors in these but these are my new knit-and-read socks - they are the Kaffe Fassett "Mirage" colors (in the earthtones colorway) that Regia puts out. I bought two balls as soon as it came out because I love Kaffe Fasset's color sense, and I love the subdued earthtones look. I've done about 3" of ribbing - I wanted these to have a very deep ribbing - and then I'm going to do about 4" of plain stockinette before doing the heel.