My student finally showed up.

I'm glad I stayed. Sometimes, when people are late, I just say "bag it" and go home. But I didn't get the "flake" vibe off of this person, didn't seem to me like someone who would later say, "Oh, I didn't feel like it" or "well, my friends were going out to the lake and they asked me to come and..." or something like that.

I knew that she worked as an orderly and also was going through a messy break up.

I had no idea how messy.

Her soon-to-be-ex is holding the material she had collected thus far for her class project hostage (that's the short version) and she has to start all over from scratch, less than 2 weeks before it's due. (I think she will manage. She's already begun. And she didn't make any requests for special consideration, or turn on the water-works as a way of softening me up*, or anything)

(*I can usually tell genuine, "I can't deal with this any more and I don't care if she sees me cry" tears from "I'm going to cry now on cue and this will make her feel bad and cut me a break" tears)

I have to say something about this situation - the ex basically trying to keep her from graduating. But I have to issue a warning. I am going to use a word that I don't usually use. It's a strong and harsh word. It's one that people might not want their children reading. But I think it's a word that fits in this case. (I rarely use obscenity, preferring to save it for extreme situations so it does not lose its power).

but I think what this woman's ex is doing is totally shitty.

There, I said it. Probably the first time in three years. But it's the only word I can come up with that describes my sheer eye-rolling disgust at his childish attitude. I mean - what does it POSSIBLY benefit you to keep something that is of no monetary or real value to you from the person who had been working on it? And if you're really interested in getting this person out of your life, then why try to prevent her from GRADUATING and MOVING ON and GETTING A JOB SOMEWHERE ELSE?

And for that matter - there are ripples. I offered to come in Monday evening (after she gets done with her two jobs) to help her identify some of the organisms she has collected for her project. So I'm going to be out some time (not that I mind - I like helping people - and I actually think her revamped project is stronger and more interesting) because of this buffoon and his "win at any cost" attitude.

It's funny. For every time I whinge about being unattached, for every time I only-half-jokingly refer to myself as the Bitter Single Girl (or Bitter Single Woman), I see someone who's not-single who's going through a lot of pain.

Oh, I know there are good marriages and good relationships out there. But I also see so many that are broken that I am almost scared off of even trying. There are so damn many screwed up people out there, maybe it's better off sleeping alone.