Yeah, yeah, yeah!

A student (not one of mine) brought in a HUGE BEETLE* just now. He works at the local Big Lots unloading and his concern was that it was a "hitchhiker" from Asia or elsewhere.

I haven't a freaking clue of what it is. It's huge, it looks like it could do considerable damage to you if you waggled a finger at it. It looks a bit like some of the water beetles I remember seeing as a kid, but it's bigger (and was found in the wrong habitat). A quick search of some of the online bug sites are not revealing. I know it is not, alas, a Pleasing Fungus Beetle nor a Handsome Fungus Beetle. And it is not the endangered American Burying Beetle (which would necessitate a quick trip back out to where it came from, for a quick stealthy repatriation of the beetle...so no one can say I molested an endangered species).

So, I'm going to pop him in the freezer (sorry, animal-lovers, but I can't photograph him when he's flopping about, and if it's an invasive species it's better off dead) and take a picture on Monday to e-mail to a regional biologist. I may also run the specimen out to the local Extension Agent to see if he knows...if it's a native thing, it's all good, but if it's some kind of Freak Chinese Tree-Eating Beetle that came in on a shipment of Barbie-doll knockoffs, then we've got a problem.

I'll post a picture here when I get one taken. Just so you all can see the true Box of Chocolates (...you never know what you might get) that my life is.

(*hence the post title, get it?)