My tenure and promotion packet is at the copiers.

Later this week, I fit each page painstakingly into a plastic sleeve, clip them into binders (I bought binders at the campus bookstore; they have the school's name on them (a bit of boosterism never hurts, says I) but they also have dragonflies on them.). And then it will be done, and all that will remain will be to breathe a little prayer over them ("Godspeed, little packet") and drop them off at my department chair's office. And then wait. Which will be somewhat stressful, although my chair has stopped *just* *short* of saying "you realize, this is just a formality in your case" to me.

I also ordered tickets home for Christmas today. I think I had been putting it off because I couldn't quite believe that life would continue after my tenure packet's due date - I can be hopelessly self-absorbed sometimes, and tend to think when there's a big due date in my life, if I miss it, the world will fall off its axis and life as we know it will come to an end. But now that I can picture the packet done, I sort of shook myself and thought "you know, the Amtrak tickets won't be getting any cheaper the longer you wait." So now, they are on their way to me.

And I can actually picture having a break again, a real break, where I get to travel and see family and sleep in and not worry about work and eat food that I haven't cooked and have someone say 'oh, just drop your laundry there, I'm doing a partial load of the same colors later so I'll just do it for you.' and that sort of thing.

I don't mind taking care of myself, all by myself, but it gets wearying sometimes.